Independence, Co-dependence and Interdependence

Good morning and Happy Tuesday! I hope you all enjoyed your weekend (some were long weekends) and are feeling positive about the new month ahead. There is definitely expansion happening, and we may be called to be more visible or visible in different ways this month.

I was lying in bed last night and got some messages around independence, co-dependence and interdependence.

Bast from the Goddess Guidance Oracle Deck by Doreen Virtue (various artists)
Bast from the Goddess Guidance Oracle Deck by Doreen Virtue (various artists)

It seemed independence was the word of the day yesterday. I pulled the Bast card from the goddess deck, whose message was independence. It was July 4th, which is the day the US celebrates their independence. And a Facebook group I’m a part of was considering the ideas of independence and freedom.

So let’s look at these three concepts.

Independence on a feeling level, is about responsibility. It means taking responsibility for what you emanate (on many levels) and the actions you take, with the result of feeling free. Freedom doesn’t necessarily have to mean freedom from external limitations, but the sense of your own capacity to access a feeling state of freedom in yourself. And we ALL have that, in every moment.

Sometimes you might have to explore the idea of ‘external’ freedom to understand that fully. Drop everything and be ‘irresponsible’ for a while and see if you truly feel free. Responsibility and freedom are not mutually exclusive. They are parts of a whole.

Co-dependence arises from the tendency/need to define your self or your power through another. It can be any number of things; for instance a behaviour, a substance or a person. It involves a high degree of self-sacrifice, as if your own energy and purpose are not worth your time and effort. It also involves relinquishing (self-)responsibility, often for emotional well-being, believing that you can source that from without, and/or that you are responsible for that of another.

Interdependence is a symbiotic relationship rooted in the understanding that we are never alone. What we need is always available, and as we are ALL energy, we can share and exchange in ways that support all involved. Interdependence is NOT living FOR another. There was a meme kicking around for a while that said something like ‘a river doesn’t flow for itself… ‘ and a few other potentially questionable thoughts. The underlying feeling was self-sacrifice, which is rooted in the old structures and aligned with the energy of co-dependence. Healthy interdependence is not self-sacrificing, it is inclusive and supportive.

A river flows for the joy of flowing because being a river is its joy, and in doing so, is also available to others for their joy and expansion. A tree takes joy in being a tree and has no concept of/interest in being a tree for the benefit of anyone else. And yet by its existence, many things thrive and experience support and safety. So interdependence and independence are closely aligned. As you take responsibility for your own experience, which includes the understanding that you are your purpose, and joy is your responsibility (and responsibility is your joy), you feel more freedom, and independence.

From that state, you welcome interdependence because you are always aligned with your joy and responsibility and can share and interact with others without the underlying attachments of co-dependence. You know how to fill your cup, and from there, share willingly. You also know how and when to ask for help, and gladly allow others to offer their support.

(Later in the day…)

Oh! More clarity on Independence. A deeper look thanks to the Bast card again today, triggered an understanding that independence is also connected to uniqueness, in a sense. That’s not quite the right word, but the closest that connects to the feeling I got.

Let me clarify: independence is the expression of your voice and your essence in your unique way. It is claiming what you are here to bring to the world, and BEing that. INdependence, like INtegrity, begins withIN. Your originality is your gift, and your independence. YES, that’s it!

In owning your original blueprint as an aspect of the Whole, you access your independence and open the way to healthy interdependence. Be bold, be original and SHINE!

Big Love,
~ Jenny

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