How to Untangle Attachments

* Also see the post entitled ‘Defining Attachment,’ which explores varying levels of attachment, including enmeshment and entanglement * Releasing attachments to old experiences can be challenging. Especially so when they’ve left you feeling hurt, betrayed or otherwise unsettled. Perhaps you felt like you built your life around the thing, person or situation that’s no longer in your life, and the attachment is the only residual tie to the deep love you experienced. It’s as if the loyalty to your pain is a distorted way of expressing the love you felt. (This brings to mind the song ‘Landslide‘ by Fleetwood Mac). This goes deeper than simply missing someone, which is a fleeting feeling of nostalgia which arises and leaves you with a sense of warmth Continue reading How to Untangle Attachments

Building Healthier Relationships

What does the word ‘relationship’ really mean? You’re connected to everyone and everything; in other words, you’re in relationship with everything in existence. The world is a mirror, into which you look and observe yourself experiencing. Fun, eh? Breaking this concept down, whoever comes into your life is an expression of some aspect of yourself. Every meeting (re)presents an opportunity for growth and expansion. The key to healthier relationships with others is to get clear on your own patterning. The reason you may be attracted to toxic or unhealthy situations is because they’re in some way familiar, and feel comfortable (even while they also feel very wrong). The familiarity can be extremely subtle, so unless you can look honestly and consciously at the root of Continue reading Building Healthier Relationships

The Fallacy of Good Enough

self-responsibility, empaths

Instead of trying to define yourself by standards of NOT good enough, doesn’t it make sense to first know what good enough is? That is, if it even exists… There isn’t an external measure in existence that can tell you this – only you know. And ultimately, existence is perfection in and of itself. There is no other measure necessary. As a young person beginning to find your way in the world, you no doubt came across many possible versions of good enough. Standardized tests in schools; advertising showing you how to be more beautiful or powerful (who decides what that means?); how to be a ‘real man’ or a ‘real woman;’ toys, clothes and other things delineated by gender and age appropriateness; any and Continue reading The Fallacy of Good Enough